Madeleine and the Succulent Watermelon

Madeleine wrote a new book, which is an obvious rip-off of Julia's "The Succulent Strawberry."  But, hey, what are little sisters for if not copying everything their older siblings do??

 Madeleine and the Succulent Watermelon

Pg. 1

So far, this looks exciting.  A severed head lying in a pool of blood beside the world's most gigantic door.  Or, as Madeleine explains:

ME: Okay, can you tell me what's going on in this picture?
MADELEINE: She's sleeping.
ME: And what's that? (pointing to the purple thing on the right)
MADELEINE: That's her door.
ME: Why did you decide to make her door that color?
MADELEINE: You mean that TALL?
ME: Well, it is tall, but I was also wondering why you decided to make a purple door.
MADELEINE: Wait.  Mama.  I think that's BLUE.
ME: Okay. 
MADELEINE: I just...wanted her to have a blue door.
ME: Oh.  Okay. (pointing to the sleeping girl) And what's her name?
MADELEINE: I forget.

Well, that clears it all up!  (And the door is TOTALLY purple.  I call shenanigans on the whole blue door thing.)



Pg. 3 (no, this is not a typo.  I discovered upon listening to Madeleine's explanations that I had posted the pages in the wrong order.  How dare I.)

Hmm.  An angel floating around above the newborn Baby Jesus, who happens to have a cactus growing out of the top of His head??

MADELEINE: That's Elsa. That's a mountain she made.  And that's a girl that was sleeping when she was a baby.  And she woke up, because in the picture BEHIND it, her older sister is telling her something, and she was saying that...it...if that she doesn't stop EATING soon, then she's going to turn back into a BABY.

Oh.  That was my second guess.


Pg. 2:

Oh, boy.  These girls do NOT look happy with each other.

MADELEINE: So, um, um, she's...you see her? (pointing to the girl on the left) She's SNEEZING, and her older sister is telling her that if she doesn't stop eating soon that she'll turn back into a baby.
ME: Was this page supposed to come before the one on the other side?
MADELEINE: Um, YES.
ME: Oh.  Sorry.  I put them out of order.

Holy cow.  This book is taking a strange turn.  Now there's an alien joining the girl-turned-baby and her sister?  This book has managed to defy all of my expectations.  I mean, I was anticipating a succulent watermelon at some point, but no such appearance.  And now there's an alien in a dress visiting our main characters?  Or did the baby keep eating despite her previous punishment, and thus turn from a baby in to an alien???  

ME: Madeleine, can you tell me about this picture?
MADELEINE: Alien.
ME: Where'd the alien come from?
MADELEINE: I just wanted to MAKE the alien.
ME: And what's the alien doing?
MADELEINE: Um, just doin' this (making a face) And SCARING people.  And...that's a sun, and that's it snowing, and that's a shooting star.
ME: Okay.
MADELEINE: And Mama? What does THAT say? (pointing to the words)
ME: It says "Alien Oh Pop."
MADELEINE: Yeah.  Julia wrote that.


That appears to be the end of "Madeleine and the Succulent Watermelon."  I have seen no evidence of a character named Madeleine, nor have I seen evidence of a succulent watermelon, but maybe there's some sort of metaphysical symbolism or something that I'm just too dim-witted to get.  I have to give Madeleine props for the surprise ending.  I never saw an alien invasion coming.  What a crazy twist!

Madeleine had another illustration along with her book, but she assures me that this is not an actual page of "The Succulent Watermelon."  I asked her to describe the contents of this page regardless.

ME: So tell me about this drawing.
MADELEINE: Um, it's...it's not right.
ME: But what is it a drawing of?
MADELEINE: (beginning to freak out) No, no, it's not the right WAY!

Yeah, I could tell you it's not right; none of Madeleine's illustrations seem quite right in the head.  The creep factor in this picture, which appears to me to be a spurt of blue guts and blood after someone got run over on the train tracks, is awfully high.

But because Madeleine couldn't handle about the picture being rotated the wrong way, I fixed it for her:

ME: All right, NOW will you tell me about it?
MADELEINE: That girl (pointing to the girl on the left) is swinging on a rope, into the leaves on a truffula tree, and then she gets SWINGED out, and then her hair is braided.  In two FRENCH BRAIDS!

Oh, I see!  Well, that makes about as much sense as the rest of her drawings, right?  Madeleine definitely likes to play it fast and loose with the plot of her stories.  I suppose it gives us "readers" an inside look into the abstract randomness that is her brain.