I decided to see what the kids thought of the dress. I showed it to each child separately so that their answers could not be swayed by what the other had said.
JULIA: Blue and brown.
MADELEINE: Blue and gold.
Neither saw white, which was interesting. I then told the girls about the whole experience Ethan and I had, and Madeleine decided she was going to SET THE RECORD STRAIGHT once and for all for Daddy.
By drawing a picture of the dress. So that he could see what the REAL colors were.
The problem was, Ethan was out at the grocery store at the time, so Madeleine couldn't show him her picture, and while she waited for him, she was suddenly struck with the irrepressible creative desire to make the picture into a snowflake.
MADELEINE: (singing and flailing around the living room, repeatedly tossing the picture in the air) Just one little snowflake, one little snowflake...
After about fifteen minutes of singing and tossing the picture around as she pranced about the room, Madeleine discovered that the paper was somewhat rumpled.
MADELEINE: (running to me in consternation) Uh, Mama? Uh, I think I need to get ANOTHER paper, because...I just CAN'T show this to Daddy if it's all WRINKLED and CRUMPLED UP!
ME: Then why did you crumple it all up?
MADELEINE: I *didn't* crumple it all up! I was pretending it was a snowflake for my SONG!
Madeleine came up with the perfect solution: she placed the drawing of The Dress on the table, and chose another blank piece of printer paper to
MADELEINE: (singing) She had no pumpkin, to carve for the slumber party, arty, arty. It was finally, finally singing season. Singing season. Oh yeah, yeah yeah yeah. Oh yeah, yeah yeah yeah yeah. Then she was singing in teeeeents, beca-hause she was trying to get the melody from the flashy people in "A Mighty Wind." Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So that little girl went to the very, very top of the tallest hill... (speaking) Uh, Julia? What's the name of the tallest hill?
JULIA: The tallest mountain?? Mt. Everest.
MADELEINE: (resuming her song) But the top of Mt. Everest was very slippery. She fell with her face, her face, her head, her face landed straight at the BOTTOM, and she dived into the ocean, she swam around with all the dolphins. Dolphin day, dolphin day, hello everybody, I'm trying to impress you, of the one...of the last...of the last...of the last...of the one...of the last SNOOOOOOOOOOW FLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!
I mean, I know The Dress was a big deal and all, but did you ever expect it would be the inspiration for the Most Amazing Song EVER?!? Madeleine's perfomance was EPIC, folks. Wish you all could have been here to witness it.