Madeleine has recently reverted back to an old (extremely annoying) habit: a compulsive lip trumpeting that is sometimes voiced (making a brrrrpt!) sound, sometimes unvoiced (making a nice old farting sound.) She frequently intersperses this lip trumpeting with a short humming noise, making her sound like some sort of old machine. "Brrrrpt. Mmmm. Brrrpt."
The need to obsessively lip trumpet sometimes undercuts the seriousness of things she's saying.
MADELEINE: Mama? Do we have any Gila Monsters around where WE live?
ME: No, they don't live anywhere near here.
MADELEINE: But Mama. I do know SOMETHING around here that can make you die. Brrrpt. Mmmm. Brrrrpt. SMOKE STICKS.
ME: Cigarettes? Yeah, that's true. But you don't need to worry about gila monsters.
Or:
ME: Madeleine, what are you most thankful for this Thanksgiving?
MADELEINE: Mommy. (thoughtful) And Daddy. And Julia. And Yiayia. And Shannon and Caitlyn. Brrrpt. Mmmm. Brrrpt. And of COURSE, Nana and Gramps!
Or:
MADELEINE: (whining shrilly from the play basement)
ME: What's the matter?
MADELEINE: (continuing to whine and throwing her shirt around in anger)
ME: (sternly) Madeleine. If you need HELP getting your shirt on, you know what to do. USE YOUR WORDS. Don't just sit there whining and throwing your shirt.
MADELEINE: (looking chagrined)
ME: You need to use your words. (beginning to help her with her shirt)
MADELEINE: (guiltily) Next time. Brrrpt. Mmmm. Brrrpt. Next time I will, Mama.
Of course, a lot of the time, even without the lip trumpet noises, what Madeleine's taking about is a big ridiculous pile of nonsense anyway.
MADELEINE: Mama? Which part is the LOWEST in our house?
ME: The basement.
MADELEINE: No. Mama. Which part is the LOWEST.
ME: I just told you. The basement.
MADELEINE: No. Mama. I mean PLUS the basement. Which is the lowest PLUS the basement?
ME: Well, the lowest part of our house is the basement.
MADELEINE: No, Mama. Which is the lowest PLUS the basement?
ME: Well, not counting the basement, the lowest part of our house is probably the landing by the front door.
MADELEINE: No, but Mama. What WINDOWS can you jump out of?
Why on earth is my child thinking about jumping out of windows?!?
I guess the only reason I can come up with is Brrrrpt. Mmmm. Brrrpt.
It was actually slightly curbed this afternoon. Although it required me shoving my entire finger into her mouth every time she did it...so that might not be ideal.
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