The Lexse of Howere

Julia started a wild and crazy new book the other day, experimenting with a mystery thriller:

Suger Plum Corner and the Lexse of Howere
by Julia Rowe



Pg. 1:

"It all begins with the goust that never ends,' said Lila."

Oh my goodness.  I'm scared already!  The goust that never ends??  So, like, it takes up infinite space with its ghostly mist, or, like, it can never, ever go away?  I can't wait to find out!


Pg. 2:

"He sturk at Suger Plum Corner with the Lexsi of Hower,' Ginny added.  It was silint." 

Yikes.  The goust that never ends AND the Lexsi of Hower, whatever that may be, were BOTH at Suger Plum Corner?  And speaking of, I'll TELL you what never ends: Ginny's legs.  Holy Cow, the girl is a giant despite her disproportionately small torso.  Those legs, man.  They last for miles!


Pg. 3:

"And this is how it begins...do not be scar'd of this story becous it migt give you the chills and now I shall begin owr story."

Okay, okay, I'll try not to be scar'd, but it's kind of hard to suppress my chills, what with the goust that never ends and the lexsi of hower and what not.  Not to mention that creepy goust narrator on this page.  STOP STARING AT ME!


Pg. 4:

Chapter 1: "Amanda walk up.  Her face was hot.  She had a misterist dream.  She thot it men't somthing.  She was showr."

But...is she REALLY showr?  I mean, maybe the misterist dream WAS just a dream.  Even though she thot it men't somthing, it could just be her mind doing whatever minds do when they produce dreams.  But given the spooky introduction to this chapter, I guess I should believe that she's showr her dream men't somthing, right?


Pg. 5:

"Lindsy wolk up.  She was completly shaking."

Wait.  Did Lindsy have the SAME MISTIRIST DREAM that Amanda had??  I bet she did!  In fact, I'm SHOWR she did!  I think their minds are being telepathically messed with by the goust that never ends!  (Or by the Lexsi of Hower.  I still want to know what that is.)


Pg. 6:

Chapter 2: "Amanda told Lindsy, 'I had a dream about the ghoust that never ends but it's not hear in Englind,' she said."

Where is it?  Is it in the Lexsi of Hower?  WHAT IS THE LEXSI OF HOWER?  THE SUSPENSE IS KILLING ME!!!


Pg. 7:

"Ok, let's get some shous on and look for it, but frist let me look more like my age."

What IS her age?  Why doesn't she look like her age as is?  And why are her legs suddenly so long?  Did she grow??  Is it the ghoust's doing??


Pg. 8:

Chapter 3: "Whean they got thar something amazing hapin'd."

WHAT?  What amazing thing hapin'd?  WE DON'T GET TO FIND OUT?!?!?  And what is the Lexsi of Hower?  OMG, I can't believe she's leaving us hanging!  I'm showr I won't be able to sleep tonight because I'll be wondering and wondering about the goust that never ends!


Boy, oh boy.  Talk about leaving me hanging.

Meanwhile, Madeleine is involved in a whole different sort of imaginary world.  She is not Madeleine at the moment; she is Emilia, and she's a fashionista who is getting ready for Christmas day.  Look how fancy she is:

Ooh la la!  Christmas pajamas paired with a pink frilly headband, a Rainbow Loom bracelet, and butterfly necklace?  Not to mention the red-painted nails.  This fashion combo has never been done before!  She's a ground-breaker!  Emilia, you are TRES CHIC!


Okay, anyway, now I've got to go hide under a blanket because I'm scar'd of the Lexsi of Hower and I'm starting to get chills.  HEEEEELP!!!!!!