Madeleine's New Book

Madeleine has started writing a new story that sounds like a recounting of Freshmen Rush Week at a sorority.  As it is all written in kindergarten spelling, I will simply provide you the Standard English translation:

Lilly and Gabee
by Madeleine Rowe

"Gabee liked to drink.  Lilly was impressed.  She gave Gabee a sticker.  Gabee liked the sticker.  She called it Stickee because Stickee was sticky."

First of all.  Lilly is impressed that Gabee likes to drink.  Are we not recruiting a new sorority member here?  Be like me!  Drink the cheap college ale!  Secondly, in kindergarten spelling, it looked like Madeleine wrote "Gabee licked the sticker."  Then I was all like WHOAH, not only is Gabee drinking, but she's taking LSD as well?!?


Pg. 2:
"Gabee was spoiled.  Whenver Gabee drank, she got a sticker.  Gabee wanted more stickers so she said 'Let me have more stickers,' she said.  Lilly was scared.  She said to Gabee, 'Well, drink some more," Lilly said so Gabee did."

Gabee, I fear this road you're on is the fast track to alcoholism.


Pg. 3:
"Gabee drank so much she drank apple juice, she drank lemonade.  'Gabee, I didn't mean this much!"

Gabee, you have a PROBLEM.  You need to admit it.  The stickers aren't worth it. 


Pg. 4
"But Gabee ignored her.  She even drank pickle juice.  She said to leave.  But Gabee said "Why leave?  I'll get my own stickers."

OMG.  Gabee has just been kicked out by Lilly.  She has literally isolated herself from the one friend she even had at the start of this book.  I mean, this Drinking Queen is chasing the stickers so hard that she even drank pickle juice.  And now she's leaving Lilly to get her own stickers.  God only knows what she'll do to acquire those stickers. 


That's where the book leaves off, but things are looking pretty bleak for our friend Gabee here.  I'm hoping there will be a miracle cure and a nice uplifting ending!  But knowing Madeleine and her proclivity towards dark art, probably not.