As I was getting dressed after my shower:
MADELEINE: (walking by the bathroom) Uh, Mama? I saw your bum.
ME: That's because I'm still getting dressed.
MADELEINE: Yeah. And I saw it when you were bending down. And I knew it was YOUR bum because it's all JIGGLY.
ME: It is?
MADELEINE: Yeah. (brightly) Hey Mama! It's just like JELLO, because it's jiggling and jellying all OVER the place!
As she peered lovingly at my smiling face:
MADELEINE: Mama? Why do your front teeth look GOLDEN?
ME: They do? Maybe I have a lot of plaque.
MADELEINE: What's plaque?
ME: It's stuff that can cause cavities.
MADELEINE: Oh. And your back tooth looks REALLY golden.
ME: Maybe I need to use teeth-whitening strips.
MADELEINE: What do those do?
ME: They help turn your teeth whiter.
MADELEINE: Gross. Like a hard-boiled egg that turns TOO white.
After I had dissolved a Listerine Breath Strip on my tongue
MADELEINE: Mama? What is that even for?
ME: It makes your mouth taste good and your breath smell better. Here, smell how minty my breath is (blowing air out of my mouth at her)
MADELEINE: (recoiling in disgust) Eeewww! That smells GROSS!
But at least she draws me special pictures like this one:
In case you're wondering, it's a picture of the baby sister who is outside looking at a shooting star while the fountain in the town square explodes.
And if that image doesn't spell "love," I don't know what does.
Good thing we don't have Madeleine surveilling our safety. Her observation skills sure are questionable! Little does she know how attractive a jiggle really is, especially on your bum!
ReplyDeleteWell. I smell all the time and my hair isn't as cool as Caitlyn's and my kisses require towels to wipe her face afterwards.
ReplyDeleteYou can always count on good old Madeleine to cheer you up! She ain't sugar coatin' nothin'!
ReplyDelete