Brutal Honesty

Madeleine tells it like it is with brutal honesty.

During dessert, Madeleine gives me a critical assessment of my body:

MADELEINE: Mama?  Do you want a marshmallow?
ME: No, the marshmallows are a little too sweet for my liking.  What I want is a cookie, but I'm trying not to eat one because I've been pigging out lately.
MADELEINE: Well Mama.  You don't LOOK like pigging out.
JULIA: Yeah, besides, if you were pigging out, your tummy would be, like, out to HERE! (holding her arms out way in front of her.)
MADELEINE: Yeah.  And your tummy doesn't - well...wait a minute...(closely scrutinizing my stomach) Well, it's a LITTLE bit like that.



Madeleine takes issue with Auntie Shannon's kisses, but not for her usual reason ("Auntie Shannon does DUCK LIPS when she kisses me!"):

AUNTIE SHANNON: (planting two kisses on Madeleine's cheek)
MADELEINE: (recoiling as if she had been bitten)
ME: What's the matter?  Duck lips?
MADELEINE: No.  After one of the kisses (screwing up her face in disgust), I started to smell something STINKY.



Madeleine makes it very clear that her stuffed animal dog takes precedence over her mother:

ME: (snuggling up to Madeleine as she arranged her various stuffed animals across her chest after I sang her lullaby)
MADELEINE: Mamaaaa!  STOP!
ME: (turning to face the other direction and give her some space)
MADELEINE: Mama.  Snuggle me.
ME: Well, I was trying to, but you yelled at me, so I figured I'd give you space.
MADELEINE: Well Mama!  That's because you were laying on FUZZY!
ME: So?  You didn't have to yell at me. You could have used your manners and said, "Excuse me Mommy, but can you please stop laying on Fuzzy?"
MADELEINE: (silence)
ME: (silence)
MADELEINE: (sullenly) Mama.  You're my VALENTINE.
ME: You're my Valentine, too, honey.
MADELEINE: So Mama.  Can you snuggle me?  Just this time: DON'T lay on Fuzzy.


Madeleine proves that no act of loving affection gets in the way of her and the toilet:

MADELEINE: (heading up the stairs to get to the bathroom)
AUNTIE SHANNON: (sitting on the top step, holding out her arms) Can I have a hug?
MADELEINE: Not this time. (Climbing over Auntie Shannon's body to get up the last step)


So, in short, a summary of Madeleine's opinions:

Auntie Shannon, no hugs or kisses, thank you very much.
Mommy, you can hug me at bedtime, because you're my medium-fat Valentine, but if you dare to lay on Fuzzy, I'll go ballistic on you.