Mother Day Gifts

The girls couldn't wait to give me my Mothers Day gifts as soon as they were up this morning.  They started off by presenting me a collaborative poster that they'd made with Daddy:

They made sure to include pictures of all my favorite things: a pumpkin, music notes, a bagel, coffee, and more!  They even included some of my non-favorite things, like milk, to which I am intolerant/allergic.  Maybe it's supposed to represent a future in which my milk allergy is cured!

Next up was this very sweet Mothers Day school project from Julia:

I especially like the fact that #6 states that Julia loves when I sing "The Green Grass Grew All Around."  Except Julia names the song by its first line, "There was a hole..." which kind of looks like the song is called "There was A*$hole."  What a great mommy, right??

And because Julia loves giving gifts so much, she didn't stop at the above project.  I received my very own Julia-written book! 

The Magic Cofie Cup
by Julia Rowe

Does this cup serve magic cofie that enhances Mom's energy ten-fold?  If so, I most DEFINITELY want some!

 "Donta, Clara and there mom where out shopping. Donta saw a magic cofie cup.  'I'll get you that cofie cup Mom if you get us 14 cans of powderd cheiase,' said Clara.  'All right,' said her mom."

First of all, to clear things up: Julia informs me that "Donta" is pronounced like the Inferno author Dante.
Secondly, smart choice, Mom!  I know that I would totally buy 14 cups of powderd cheiase in return for a magic cofie cup!

"They went home.  'Can I have some poterd chease mom?' asket Donta.  'Ohky,' said the mom.  They got out of the car.  'I don't feel tierd!' said the mom.  'This cofie cup is really good,' said the Mom."

The mom has a really square crotch. 

"Mom I'm going to bed,' said Clara.  'You do that,' said her mom.  Clara got into bed.  'I'm going to work,' said there mom.  Clara and Donta where nerves.  There mom did not get any sleep.'

No wonder they're nerves.  There mom looks like she turned into FRANKENMOM.  And she didn't get any sleep and now she's going to work??  Moms NEVER do that.

"We have to get that cofie cup,' said Donta.  'Befor it's to late,' said Clara.  They rote down a plan."

I can see why they needed to rite down that plan.  It has so many steps and it seems so complicated.  I can imagine they were worried they might forget what to do without referring to their list.

"The next day Clara ran to her mom.  'I want to get you this,' she said.  She tried to take the cofie cup.  Then Donta tried.  'I got it,' he yelled.  'YAY!' said Clara."

Good work, Donta!  You succeeded and saved the day!  Especially after Clara's LAME failure of an attempt.

"And they all live'd happylie ever after.  Without the magic cofie cup."
The end.

Hooray!  What a story!  I have been warned: no magic cofie cup for me.  Unless I want to get no sleep and go to work the next day!


Julia had yet another gift for me, a decorated snowflake:

Thanks, mine Julia!


Madeleine made me one of the classic handprint with poem gifts at school:

She apparently has amnesia about this project, however, as she insists she didn't make it.

Not to worry, though.  Madeleine is still very aware that today is Mothers Day.  Especially while she was ready for her second breakfast as I had just sat down to my first.

MADELEINE: (shouting from the living room) Mamaaa?  Can you get me a BOWL?
ETHAN: Madeleine, you can get a bowl yourself.
MADELEINE: But it's Mothers Day.
JULIA: (condescending) Madeleine.  Mothers Day means you DON'T bother your mommy to get you things.
MADELEINE: But I want Mama to get it.

Hope Yiayia, Nana, and any other mommy blog readers have a wonderful day today!