Dentist Visit #2

Another trip to the dentist this week: this morning, we had Madeleine's cleaning, which means she was fortunate enough to get a NEW ginormous balloon.  She is definitely not allowed to sit on this one.

Madeleine was full of back seat chatter as I drove on over to the dentist's office, pontificating on all sorts of deep topics.

MADELEINE: Mom?  Why are your poopies brown and your pee-pees are red and SOMETIMES your pee-pees are YELLOW?
ME: Well, my pee-pees are only red when I have my period.  Do you know why?  Because when I have my period, something INSIDE my body is bleeding, so the blood comes out with my pee.  Most of the time my pee is yellow, just like yours.
MADELEINE: (thinking hard) Well Mom?  When I'M a mommy, I'm not gonna have any CHILDREN come out of me, and I'm not gonna have my PERIOD.
ME: Oh, really? 
MADELEINE: Yeah.  Because...SOME mommies DON'T have periods.  Right Mom?
ME: Well, periods are something that happen to all women.  One day you'll have your period.  Probably when you're a teenager.
MADELEINE: Well Mom?  Since I'm ALMOST a Mommy, I'm gonna PLAY when I wake up, and watch a show.  Because...you're ALLOWED to play while you watch a show.  That's my PLAN.  Because...I was using my PLAN voice.

That plan is TOTALLY related to the subject of periods.  I mean, does she get it or WHAT?

Before I knew it, Madeleine was on to a completely different topic.

MADELEINE: Mom?  What is PLAIN?
ME: What's a plane?
MADELEINE: No.  Mom.  What is PLAIN?  Plain is PASTA.  Plain is the color of PASTA.  Mom?  What color is pasta?
ME: Uh...well, I guess you're right.  Pasta is kind of plain colored.  Sort of tan.
MADELEINE: Pasta is PLAIN.  Mom!  Pasta and DOORS are the same COLOR! 
Mom?  I think "pasta" and "sea" rhyme!  Do "pasta" and "sea" rhyme??

She was seriously hitting it out of the park with her astute observations.

Every once in awhile, when I was focusing on traffic lights or other driving-related issues, I made the mistake of answering things Madeleine said in a completely unacceptable way. 

MADELEINE: (babbling on about something I couldn't really pay attention to)
ME: Yeah.
MADELEINE: Mom.  Say "right!"
ME: What?
MADELEINE: Mom.  You said "YEAH."  You're supposed to say "RIGHT."
ME: Oh.  Right.
MADELEINE: Say "Right!"
ME: Right.
MADELEINE: First you said "righttt" (violently enunciating the final "t").  Second you said "right."  The first time you said it too ANGRY.

Oh my God.  Apparently I am just a complete and utter failure as a conversationalist.  Good thing I had Madeleine to coach me along.

When it was time for Madeleine's check-up, she was good as gold, complying easily with everything the dental hygienist needed her to do.  I'm glad she got all her verbal diarrhea out during the car ride, because she managed to keep her mouth wide open without interrupting the procedure to talk the way she often does when I'm trying to brush her teeth.  In fact, Madeleine herself seemed to recognize her own stellar behavior.  As we sat in the exam room, awaiting the dentist to come evaluate the hygienist's work, Madeleine suddenly broke the silence with an announcement: "Wow!  I'm being a REALLY patient girl!"

Indeed.  She totally earned her new, dark pink balloon.

Hopefully, she will be less tempted to use this as a hop ball, seeing as the weather is finally nice enough for her to hop around on the real hop ball outside, as well as jump on our mini-trampoline.

As you can see, she is graceful as always:

Okay, I'm going to go play and watch a show now, because I'm ALLOWED to since I'm a mommy.