Elves And Badminton

Conversation while playing Badminton in the backyard:

MADELEINE: I wish ELVES were real.
ME: You do?  Why?
MADELEINE: Because then they could cure CORONAVIRUS.
ME: Why would elves cure coronavirus?
MADELEINE: Because.  They heal EVERYTHING.
ME: They do??
MADELEINE: Yeah.  In "Keeper of the Lost Cities" they heal everything.
ME: Oh, okay.
MADELEINE: Hey Mommy!  Wanna play "Keeper of the Lost Cities" and there's a convention where everybody learns that elves are REAL and they're curing CORONAVIRUS?
ME: Uh...sure...
MADELEINE: Okay.  I'll be the elves.  How about you just be yourself, and I'll be EVERYBODY else?
ME: Okay.
MADELEINE: So you're Courtney.
ME: Okay. I know.
MADELEINE: ...
ME: ...
MADELEINE: So, wanna play?
ME: I'm waiting for you to start.
MADELEINE: Okay. Hey! Look, there are elves over there!
ME: Elves are real?
MADELEINE: Well, you SEE them, don't you?
ME: How do I know they're real elves?  Maybe they're using magic to disguise their real forms.
MADELEINE: Well, elves are a lot like PEOPLE.
ME: They are?
MADELEINE: Well, they don't have, like, pimples and stuff.  Actually, I don't know if they have pimples or not.
ME: Couldn't elves cure their own pimples if they can cure everything?
MADELEINE: Oh. Yeah!  Uh, Mommy?  You're not really acting like yourself.
ME: I'm not?
MADELEINE: Well, you're not really TALKING like you usually do.
ME: Well, I've never been in a situation in real life where someone is telling me elves are real, so I'm not really sure how I'm supposed to talk.
MADELEINE: Well, just, like, act like YOURSELF.
ME: I am.
MADELEINE: No, you're talking, like, kind of DIFFERENT...that's not how you really talk.


Apparently I'm so bad at pretend play that I can't even convincingly play my own real self. FAIL.