Madeleine has a field trip coming up in a few weeks and I have volunteered as a chaperone. Clearly, Madeleine doesn't realize the level of expertise I have as a field trip chaperone, because she has decided to become my backseat driver.
MADELEINE: Hey. Mommy. What's that?
ME: It's a letter for the chaperones.
MADELEINE: Can I see it?
ME: Why? It's just telling me what I need to do for the trip.
MADELEINE: I just wanna read it.
ME: Okay. But make sure you give it back because I'll need all the details.
MADELEINE: (taking the paper and beginning to read) The buses are leaving at 9:15.
ME: I know.
MADELEINE: (reading further, then looking up at me to read aloud) "It would be great if you could get here by 9:00."
ME: Yup, I know.
MADELEINE: Wait. But Mommy? Do you know where my classroom is?
ME: Nah. It's not like I came to your Readers' Theater performance or your 100th day party or to be a Mystery Reader twice.
MADELEINE: (totally not getting the sarcasm) Wait. Mommy! You *did* come to my performance!
ME: I know. That's why I said it sarcastically. Because how could I have come if I didn't know how to get to your classroom?
MADELEINE: (still not getting the sarcasm) Wait. AND you came to my 100th day party!
ME: Right. And I was Mystery Reader twice. So don't you think I know how to get to your classroom?
Clearly, Madeleine still wasn't willing to trust me on this crucial front.
MADELEINE: Wait, I know what you could do. If you *didn't* know how to get to my classroom, you could, like, just go to the desk in the OFFICE, and say you need to find the room where my teachers teach.
ME: Okay.
MADELEINE: Well, actually, we also have a ROOM NUMBER. So you could ask how to get to our room number.
I guess she's really worried about me finding her classroom. It's a good thing I have Madeleine to remind me what time the buses are leaving, what time to be there, and what to do should I suffer a sudden memory lapse and become unable to find her classroom. I'll let you know how it goes in couple of weeks. Will it be a success, or will I be an utter failure at finding the classroom at the right time and boarding the bus with the kids??
Too bad Madeleine forgets to get herself ready on time in the a.m. You should write her a letter with a bullet by bullet instruction as to what she needs to do. You can send it to her, and when she goes to open it, you can read it to her line by line. Tell her that you only doing that in case she can't remember what time she is supposed to be ready on school mornings, and what she needs to do to be ready at that time. Then you can hang it on the back of her door, so she can remember her morning protocol! Hahahahaha. See how she likes being second-guessed!
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