My Genes

The kids seem to have inherited some of my less enviable traits.


1.) Being afraid to do anything I'm not 100% sure how to do or that is out of my comfort zone

Me in this situation:

ME: Ethan, will you look at these weeds in the front garden?  Do you think they're invading the grass?  Do we need to plant more grass seed?
ETHAN: Take a picture of the weeds and bring them to the garden store.  They'll probably know what you should do.
ME: (silently panicking because I don't know what to say when I get to the garden store and I'm afraid to even initiate a conversation at the counter) Um, but you think there's nothing to worry about, so we don't need to do anything??


Julia in this situation:

ME: (coming out of the girls' school, having had Julia's conference, just as the girls are arriving) Julia, can you do me a favor?  I forgot to sign myself out on the visitors' log on the front desk.  Can you just write the time next to my name for me?
JULIA: (looking utterly panicked) Is it gonna be SCARY?
ME: Okay, forget it.



2.) Being a klutzy doofus

Me in this situation:

ME: (taking a sip of coffee, feeling it go down the wrong pipe, and desperately forcing myself to swallow the rest of the coffee before the uncontrollable urge to cough takes over.  Swallowing and then coughing so forcefully for so long that I feel short of breath)
ETHAN: Are you okay?!?
ME: (continuing to cough so hard that my nose starts spewing)
ETHAN: Courtney?  Are you all right?
ME: (getting up to get a tissue, getting light-headed from lack of oxygen, and tipping over onto the floor underneath the table)
ETHAN: Okay.  Okay.  Just sit still.
ME: (trying to stand up)
ETHAN: Wait a minute, you're going to bang into-
ME: (standing up and crashing my back into the table)
ETHAN: That's what I was trying to tell you.


Madeleine in this situation:

MADELEINE: (in her room in a time-out after being rude to Ethan while on a bike ride)
ETHAN AND I: (hanging out in the dining room, and suddenly hearing a thundering crash from Madeleine's room) What was that??
MADELEINE: (silence)
ETHAN: (opening Madeleine's bedroom door) Are you okay?  What happened?
MADELEINE: (eyes brimming full of tears) I tried to sit on my bed and I fell on the floor!
ETHAN: You mean you missed?
MADELEINE: (tears overflowing) Yeaaaaah!!


Go, Courtney Elf genes!  Make the Rowe kids timid and klutzy!