Madeleine Says...

A sampling of Madeleine sayings today:


Driving home from picking up take-out:

MADELEINE: Ah-kah street.  Mama.  We're on Ah-kah street.
ME: (not paying her much heed) Oh, yeah?
MADELEINE: Yeah.  Ah-kah street.
JULIA: Madeleine.  Ah-kah street?!?
MADELEINE: Yeah!  It says "O-A-K."

Only Madeleine can make the word "oak" sound closer to "Oaxaca."



During a play-date with one of her school friends:

MADELEINE: This is my aunt's exercise ball!
FRIEND: But you're playing with it?
MADELEINE: Yeah.  I'm bouncing it.  It's a ball.  So.  How do you think you spell "ball?"
FRIEND: Uh...um...I don't know.
MADELEINE: Okay.  I'll tell you.  "B-A-" (waiting for her friend to complete the word) "Ulllll....ullllll....Okay, I'll just tell you.  "B-A-L.  Ball!"

Good thing we have Madeleine to teach the know-nothings how to spell.



During bedtime snuggles:

MADELEINE: Mama?  In the Jesus song that's the MEAN people, I wouldn't want to do that to Jesus.
ME: You mean you wouldn't do the mean things they're doing to Him?
MADELEINE: Yeah.  I wouldn't WANT to.
ME: I know that, honey.  I know you love Jesus!
MADELEINE: I have a CRUSH on Jesus, and Captain Jack Sparrow.

Madeleine's love interests.  Clearly she has a thing for men with facial hair.

Chatterbox and Zombie

One child is a non-stop verbal fountain and the other is such a tv zombie that she can't tell when someone is talking to her.

On the way to swim practice today, Julia was an endless chatterbox:

JULIA: Mom?  Do you, know what I was doing in my room before it was time to go to swim?
ME: Uh, reading?
JULIA: No!
ME: Playing with your American Girls?
JULIA: Yes!  And Mom.  So, I was pretending that May and Elina were, like, SO mad, because it's only FIFTY DEGREES out where they live.  And Linsy lives in TEXAS, so, it was, like, SO hot where she is, and May and Elina thought that it wasn't FAIR that it's so hot where Linsy lives.  And Kirsten finally got to take off her cardigan, and, like, it was the FIRST TIME all year that it was warm enough to take off her cardigan.  And Mom?  So, I like to pretend that, like, the names of the ROADS they live on are, like, "Minnesota Road" and things like that.  So Kirsten lives on Minnesota Road, because, well, she lives in Minnesota! 
ME: Oh, I see.
JULIA: Mom?  I just thought up ANOTHER ginger ale joke! 
ME: You did?
JULIA: Yes!  So: what did one can of ginger ale say to the other can of ginger ale?
ME: Uh, what?
JULIA: Let's go to MinneSODA!
ME: Oh, that's a good one!
JULIA: And Mom?  Why are there so many jokes you can make with the word "soda??"

I was only aware of the two.  Both made up by Julia.  The above mentioned, and this one:

QUESTION: What did the Sierra Mist say to the other Sierra Mist?
ANSWER: Soda ya wanna come over to my house?


Meanwhile, this has been Madeleine lately while zoning out on tv:

JULIA: So can we go to the store now, Shannon?
AUNTIE SHANNON: Sure.  Are you gonna bring your money along with you?
JULIA: Oh!  Yeah!  I forgot!  (running upstairs to collect her money)
MADELEINE: (to Auntie Shannon, while staring straight ahead at the tv) Uh, where is Julia bringing her melatonin along with her to?


Or this:

MADELEINE: (watching Power Puff Girls with her friend Lilly)
LILLY: Madeleine, is that how Bubbles talks?
MADELEINE: (silence)
LILLY: Is that how Bubbles talks, Madeleine? 
MADELEINE: (silence)
LILLY: (louder) Madeleine, is that how Bubbles talks?  Madeleine.  Madeleine?  Is that how Bubbles talks, Madeleine?
MADELEINE: (lazily and dopily) Whaaat?
LILLY: Is that how Bubbles talks?
MADELEINE: (silence)
LILLY: Madeleine. Is that how Bubbles talks?
MADELEINE: Uh, no


Or this:

MADELEINE: (watching Littlest Pet Shop)
AUNTIE SHANNON: (walking through the play room) Hi, Madeleine!
MADELEINE: (finger lodged up nose, digging away while still staring at the screen) Hi, Daddy.

 
Madeleine most definitely shares her father's skills at multi-tasking.

Finger Worries

As we were driving home from a play-date this afternoon, the girls joyfully opened their car windows to enjoy the fresh, warm spring air.  And then, in a completely bizarre role-reversal, Madeleine became the one to voice a series of completely irrational worries, while Julia scoffed at the face of danger.

MADELEINE: Julia, don't put your hand out the window like that!
JULIA: Madeleine, I like to.
MADELEINE: But Julia.  Birds might think that your fingers are WORMS, and they might try to eat your fingers off!
JULIA: Madeleine.  No they WON'T.
MADELEINE: But Julia.  You SHOULDN'T put your hand out the window!
JULIA: I do this all the TIME, Madeleine.
MADELEINE: (after a few moments of peaceful silence) Well Julia, you might hit your hand against the TREES when we're driving by them. 
JULIA: I'm not gonna hit my hand against TREES, Madeleine.
MADELEINE: Uh, Julia, I really think that a bird might think your fingers are WORMS and eat them off your hand!
JULIA: (condescending) Madeleine.  A bird would NOT think my fingers are worms.  A bird wouldn't try to eat them off me.  A bird would be SCARED to come that close to a human in a car.
MADELEINE: Well Julia.  Now I'm thinking about scraping your hands on BUILDINGS.

At this point, I decided to intervene.

ME: Madeleine, is it making you feel nervous that Julia is hanging her hand out the window?
MADELEINE: Mmm-hmm.
ME: Why, honey?
MADELEINE: Because.  Mama.  I worry about birds thinking my fingers are worms and trying to eat them off ALL THE TIME.


She does?!?  I had no idea that anyone on earth ever worried about that.

In other news, Madeleine apparently decided to hang some more of her artwork on the wall with tape, without me knowing about it.  I discovered this unidentifiable piece of surrealist art on the dining room wall today:

I'm not sure what this is supposed to be a picture of, but I'm pretty sure it is something to do with (what else) Power Puff Girls.  Sigh.

Madeleine Quotes of the Day

Madeleine has been full of memorable quotes all day today, starting with the moment I peeked into her room to see if she was awake this morning.

ME: Good morning, honey!
MADELEINE: Hi, Mommy.
ME: Did you just wake up?
MADELEINE: Mmm-hmm.  And Mama?  My hand fell asleep.
ME: Yeah?  Is it all tingly?
MADELEINE: Yeah.  It always feels like there's DOTS on it.  Invisible DOTS.
ME: Oh, that's a good way to describe it.  Sometimes that feeling is called "pins and needles."
MADELEINE: (thoughtful) Mama?  Is a needle the metal pointy thing that you use when you're sewing?
ME: Yes, exactly.


I don't know, though.  I think I might like "invisible dots" better than "pins and needles."  Maybe I'll adopt that as my new expression next time one of my limbs falls asleep.


Madeleine had a blast at school today, playing outside in the warm, summer-like weather.  As we drove home after pick-up, Madeleine chattered about the warmth.

MADELEINE: Mama.  It was SO warm outside, and even it was so warm that the weather started to get NASTY.  Because it was SO hot.
ME: Yeah, when the weather starts to feel really hot, it's a smart idea to find some shade.
MADELEINE: Yeah.  Because Mama.  I could BARELY even go on the tires, because they were SO hot.

We then drove by a beautifully blossoming tree, which led Madeleine to tell me about the trees near Auntie Caitlyn's apartment, where she and Julia spent the night on Friday.

MADELEINE: Oh, I *love* those kinds of trees!  And Mama.  We got to walk through this WONDERLAND of trees.  It was, like, really a WONDERLAND, and there were even petals all over the GROUND!

I wish I could have walked through the wonderland, although my allergies probably appreciate the fact that I didn't.

Speaking of things Madeleine did at Auntie Caitlyn's house, she got to watch several of the "Pirates of the Caribbean" movies, and is now simultaneously obsessed with the Power Puff Girls (still) and Captain Jack Sparrow.  Apparently she thinks I should be obsessed with the pirate cap'n as well, as she came home from school with a picture that she had made for me:

I have not seen more than the first movie, and that was ages ago, so I was not familiar with the "Stop blowing holes in my ship" line, but thankfully Auntie Shannon cleared it all up for me and saved the day by successfully reading Madeleine's "kindergarten spelling."  (ME: I love your kindergarten spelling, Madeleine!  MADELEINE: Yeah.  Because Mama. I really WANTED to kindergarten spell, because you always tell me to try it!)

At any rate, Madeleine and I are going to go enjoy the warm, sometimes nasty, weather outside until I have to go to work, and I will most heartily endeavor to sotp blowing hlls on her cep.

Madeleine Art

Just some typical old Madeleine drawings strewn about the table:

Quotes of the Day

Quote of the day, from Julia:

(While we were in the car with NPR on the radio)

JULIA: Mom?  Why do people on the radio have to sound like they're ROBOTS?  Like, why do they have to say every sentence with, like, NO expression in their voices??



Quote of the day, from Madeleine:

(to her classmate, next to her on the rug at school, while I led a music session)

MADELEINE: Ugh!  Your BREATH smells like a baby's DIAPER!

Bonus Post

Bonus post, for those of you not on facebook:

(A copy of my latest post)


As I lay cuddling Madeleine in her bed after her bedtime story, she suddenly erupted into giggles.

ME: What's so funny??
MADELEINE: I was just THINKING about something funny.
ME: What is it?
MADELEINE: If people, including us, were alive during Jesus' time, I was thinking about sticking my BUTT behind Caiaphas!
ME: What would you do that for??
MADELEINE: So he could SMELL it!
ME: So you would punish him by making him smell your stinky butt?
MADELEINE: (delighted) YES! And I'd put my FEET in his face! And...I would give Jesus a JUICE BOX when He was thirsty.


Just a normal old 5-year-old night-time fantasy, right??