New Year's Eve

Happy New Year from the Rowes!

MADELEINE: Mommy?  What I love about the New Year is telling JOKES.  Like..."See ya next year!"  Or..."Oh my God, I haven't seen you since last YEAR!"  or, like..."See ya in a year."

What *I* love about the New Year is the extra time off from school and work to spend with my family.  We did our traditional New Year's Eve events in town, starting with a marionette show, "The Fairy Circus."

JULIA: (in a terrified whisper) Wait, is that a clown?!?

There was another clown too:

Next we went to a series of performances by the Charles River Ballet Academy, where Madeleine was delighted to hear her favorite movie soundtrack music ("Pirates of the Carribbean") during one of the dances.

Last was a magic show:

And we finished off with our traditional New Year's Eve dinner of Mexican cuisine:

I leave you, and 2018, with the following:

MADELEINE: I don't think of January as the New Year.  I think of January as old, miserable, dreaded.

Happy almost January, all!

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas from the Rowe household!:

Madeleine delivered this stocking gift to Ethan and I:

Now, I'm not sure what the difference between plain old bed bugs and GDA bed bugs is, but I totally agree that bed bugs of any kind belong on the Notty List.

Wishing you all a wonderful end to 2018!!

Christmas Pageant

Today was our church Christmas pageant, and playing the part of the Virgin Mary was none other than Madeleine Rowe!  This was not Madeleine's first time at the Virgin Mary rodeo, however; she was honored with the part back in her preschool pageant.  Luckily, this time, Madeleine did not decide to yell the phrase "POOP DOG!" at the audience like she did back in her pre-K pageant.  In fact, this Virgin Mary was on perfect behavior.  Here's a clip from the performance:




Julia had an important part in the pageant as well: she was a Wise (Wo)Man:

Julia got to carry the gold to Jesus and say: "I give you gold because you are a King."  However, it turns out she really wished she could be the Wise (Wo)Man carrying myrrh?  Why?  "Because I like how the myrrh thingie is shaped."  I guess she really wishes she could be the King who gets these lyrics in "We Three Kings":

Myrrh is mine, his bitter perfume
Breathes a life of gathering gloom
Sorrowing, sighing, bleeding, dying, 
Sealed in a stone-cold tomb.


Speaking of roles played, the most important role of all, that of Baby Jesus, was played by Madeleine's Baby Lily!:

Madeleine planned on bringing Baby Lily because, as she explained, "Last year we had NO JESUS, because everybody thought that SOMEONE ELSE was gonna bring a baby doll!" Thank goodness for Madeleine this year, since no one else brought a Jesus.  Baby Lily played her part flawlessly, or, as Madeleine put it, "She didn't even mind being called Jesus, or having to pretend to be a BOY!"

Bravo to all involved in the production!

A Typical Night

Even though we have Nana and Gramps here for a Christmas visit, the girls have not strayed from their usual activities.  Madeleine has been in full-on creation mode, even starting a brand new novel, called "Changes in the Wind."  She read this aloud to Ethan, Nana, Gramps and I before bedtime.  So far, the book is written in something of an epistolary form; each section is a journal entry narrated by a different character. 

Here's an excerpt from Tennessee's journal (for some background, Tennessee is "one of the most popular girls in the school"):




The added bonus for those of us listening live was the background noise wafting up from the play room: that of Julia's heaving breaths as she lunged her body into full-body Gallop Time.  She simply can't get herself ready to bed without some good old-fashioned galloping, visitors be damned.

Yup, folks.  This is my household.

Rounding Up

Driving home from swim team:

MADELEINE: Mommy?  When we get home, I'm gonna use my CRAFT supplies to make an imaginary CREATURE, and I'm gonna write "A.M" on it, because it stand for-
ME: Maybe you can make it in the morning, because it's seven already.
MADELEINE: It's six-fifty-eight!  (reprovingly) Mommy, that's a LIE.
ME: Honey.  It's not a lie.  It's called rounding.
MADELEINE: (indignantly) It's called "SIX-FIFTY-EIGHT."

Well.  She showed me.  She then proceded to stare at the car clock for the next two minutes so she could triumphantly announce, "NOW it's seven!"  Good thing she keeps me honest.

Work Together

Instead of going to bed after swim practice tonight, Madeleine decided to write and record a song!  Auntie Shannon was baby-sitting and got the privilege of a live performance, but luckily, she videoed it for all to see:




Want to know more about the lyrics?  Here they are, penned in the composer/lyricist's own hand:

Is there anything this kid can't do??

Anti-Oxidants

Conversation this morning between Madeleine and Auntie Shannon:

MADELEINE: What work were you just doing downstairs?
AUNTIE SHANNON: I was writing up the results of my lab experiments.
MADELEINE: To find a cure for cancer?
AUNTIE SHANNON: Right.
MADELEINE: You should make a MEDICINE!
AUNTIE SHANNON: Well, that's kind of what I'm trying to do.
MADELEINE: You should use oil!  You should use soap!  You should use coffee!
AUNTIE SHANNON: Well, coffee is good for fighting cancer.

Madeleine then brought this discussion to me, as I was doing my hair for church.

MADELEINE: Mommy!  Did you know that coffee can cure cancer?
ME: Well, it's an anti-oxidant.
MADELEINE: What's an OXIDANT?
ME: Something that oxidizes.
MADELEINE: Are you just trying to say "accident" with a British accent?

Yup.  That's what I was doing.  Good thing I have Madeleine to keep me on track.  I thought I was talking about oxidizing agents, but luckily I had her there to remind me that I was just doing a dodgy accent.

Select Choir Concert

This evening, Julia had her first full Middle School Select Choir concert.  I was truly stunned by what a mature sound the group made and how lovely they sounded.  I was further surprised to discover Julia had a part in a soli in the middle of a piece by Brahms.  I managed to get my act together and start filming once I realized what was going on:




The choir director had given a little spiel about this piece, called Marienwurmehen, and read us the English translation of the German text.  Clearly, Madeleine paid careful attention, because in the middle of the piece this happened:

MADELEINE: (leaning over to whisper to me) What does this mean in French?

The group ended their concert with a fun piece called African Noel, or, as my devoted blog-reader Lily once thought it went, "Sing We On the Well":




The Middle School Select Band played next, and they were incredibly good for a 6th-8th grade ensemble!  Their final piece was called "The Call of the Wild," and the conductor explained that the composer wrote this as if imagining he was composing the soundtrack to the movie of the eponymous book.  No sooner had the music started than this:

MADELEINE: (leaning over to whisper to me) This sounds like music that belongs in a movie.

At the end of the piece, Madeleine announced, "I think I'm gonna make a movie about that music, because it inspired me!"

At least I can be sure that Madeleine really listened to what the directors had to say and didn't go off onto another mental planet AT ALL.

Persuasive Writing

Madeleine is learning about persuasive writing at school.

I'd LOVE to buy healthier food!  The question is, would Madeleine actually eat it?  She is currently on strike from:

-grapes
-oranges
-clementines
-melons
-sandwich bread
-sandwich rolls
-cheese
-yogurt with any fruit chunks in it
-applesauce
-blueberries
-salad
-lettuce of any sort
-pineapple
-Lucky Charms (which I have never even bought)
-raspberries
-tomatoes
-potatoes


So, when I pack her the only type of yogurt she will eat (Vanilla with M&Ms), I'm kind of already stretching to get any kind of protein and calcium into her diet, and most of the time her fruit comes home untouched because of perceived black spots on it, so...yeah, I'll get right on that buying healthier food thing, Madeleine!

Madeleine's movie.

Madeleine decided that she wants to make a movie using the iMovies program on her computer.  In the midst of dinner, she sprung it upon me that I was needed in the upcoming scene.  My part was simple: I merely had to inform Madeleine that we were going to a cabin for Christmas this year.

I gave it my best shot.

However, my delivery was apparently not up to snuff.

MADELEINE: Mommy?  You might wanna work on your acting a little bit.
ME: Why, what did I do wrong?
MADELEINE: You said your line with too much SUSPENSE.
ME: So I did a bad job?
MADELEINE: (guiltily): Sorry, Mommy.

She continued to try and explain her critique on the car ride to swim.

MADELEINE: Mommy, the reason that I told you that is because on "My Little Pony," Princess Celestia is REALLY BAD at acting, and nobody tells her, and then they accidentally tell her, and she gets really upset that nobody told her the truth.
ME: So you thought you would let me know that I stunk at acting so that you were being honest?
MADELEINE: Well, you didn't STINK, it's just that you could use a little work on your LINE.
ME: Okay, how should I have said it?
MADELEINE: Well, you just said it with too much SUSPENSE.


I guess I should take it from the expert actress herself.  Behold my scene and then hers, and you'll see who the TRUE natural shining actress is:

Sparklies

Long-time readers will know that EVERY Christmas season for years, Madeleine has felt the need to announce "Sparklies!" each time she sees a house or business decorated with Christmas lights.  This "tradition" has gotten even more ridiculous this season.

MADELEINE: Mommy?  Do you know that instead of saying "Sparklies!" I decided to change it to "Sparklies: Yay!"?
ME: No, I didn't know that.

I may not have known about the change when she first told me about it, but I sure do now. 

Driving to swim team Monday night:

MADELEINE: Mommy?  Today at schoo-Sparklies: Yay! - we were - Sparklies: Yay! -  Uh...so, we were talking ab- Sparklies: Yay!  Reflecting sparklies: Yay! - about our persuasive essays - Sparklies: Yay!  Sparklies: Yay!  Reflecting sparklies: Yay! - and Mrs.- Sparklies: Yay!
ME: (not nearly as patiently as I should be speaking) Madeleine.  Either say "Sparklies: Yay!" for the whole drive and tell me the story later, or STOP saying "Sparklies: Yay!" until you're done with the story.  But when you're doing both at the same time, I can't follow your story.
MADELEINE: Okay.  Sorry.  I'm not gonna say it (blurting uncontrollably) Sparklies: Yay!  Sorry, I just had to say it.
ME: Honey, you need to try and control that urge.
MADELEINE: But it's my TRADITION!


I love this tradition.  I so look forward to after-dark drives through town during this time of year.  Does it take a whole car ride to get one complete sentence out of Madeleine's mouth?  Why, indeed it does, if that at all!  Sparklies: YAY!

Alicorn Synonyms

Conversation in the living room this evening:

JULIA: Madeleine, wanna know some other words for "alicorn?"  They're really weird sounding.
MADELEINE: What are they?
JULIA: There's "Pegacorn..."
MADELEINE: Ugh.
JULIA: And then the WORST one is "Usilus."
MADELEINE: Ew.  That sounds like a swear, or like the scientific name for POOP.


Harsh critics.

Madeleine's Essay

First off, let me wish a happy birthday to one of my most-devoted readers!  Happy Birthday, Lily!


Secondly, I wanted to share Madeleine's non-fiction writing from school with you all (all spelling and grammar appears as in the original):

A Day in the Rain at As

By Madeleine Rowe

It was a hot, hot Summer full of rain, sun, and thunderstorms.  My sister Julia and I had swam for the Needham Sharks (as always), our town swimteam.  We both qualified for A championships, so we got up early in the morning to go.  B championships had passed a week ago, but the excitement had started before that.  "Is it time to go now!?!" Julia asked.  "No." answered Mommy.  "We're not all ready."  "Is it time???" I called from downstairs as soon as I finished getting ready.  "For the last time, we're not ready!!!" Mommy yelled.  "Sorry.  I'm excited!!!" I said.  "I can tell." Daddy told me.

Exactly 26 minutes later, we got in the car.  Mommy put the car into drive, and we were off.  I kept my eye on the weather, because Mommy said it would probably rain that day.  It was barely a drizzle outside right then, but who knew what would happen?  I looked outside almost the entire time, but stopped once or twice to look at my feet.  It was a long but short drive.

Finnally, we got to Newton.  It was cloudy but not rainy.  We walked through the wet grass.  "My feet are wet!" I cried.  Mommy and Julia giggled.  "Of course they are!  It's the dew." explained Mommy.  "And the rain." I corrected her.

When we got the tent, Julia put her stuff down.  I looked around.  I felt tears form in my eyes.  "Where can I put my stuff?"  I barely managed to say softly.  "Here, Madeleine.  You can put your stuff here."  Our friend Molly, patted the spot next to her on her towel.  Those girls weren't kind enough to let you sit with them."  She smirked at Julia and her fraturnal twin, Claire.  They nodded rapidly.  "Okay, uh, yeah." I studdered. I sat down slowly on the dirty pink towel.  Molly hugged me.  "See, girls?  Madeleine's my friend." she bragged.  "I'm both your friends." I said.  Molly and Claire shrugged.  Claire continued chatting with Julia and Molly got back to writing in her journal.  After warm-ups, we all scurried back over to the tents.  It's not raining.  It's not raining. I told myself.  It was sprinkling.  "It's raining!"  I bundled up in my sweatshirt.  The pool was as cold as the air, so everyone needed extra layers.  I layed my feet down on Molly's towel.  Bare feet + rough cement = feet hurt.

The rain continued, getting harder and harder every half minute.  It seemed determined to annoy us, not even bothering to listen to God, who was trying to answer our prayers.

The roofs of the tents would sag with the piles of rain on top.  The older, taller people had to push the rain off.  But that water would rush in!  And every time someone would push, another filled up.  All the tents were flooded and I started crying!

Finnally, the rain stopped.  No one had been washed away, and I was safe.  So we all went to the showers to warm up.

(End of Essay)


Okay, I am legitimately impressed with Madeleine's writing skills here.  However, I must point out a few things I noticed.

#1: I can guarantee I did not ever yell at the girls that morning, let alone yell "For the last time, we're not ready!!!"  I'm WAAAAY nicer than that.

#2: I can guarantee I didn't drive to the pool because I don't dare to drive with Ethan in the car.  He's the worst backseat (passenger seat) driver because he knows I'm the worst driver's seat driver.

#3: I like how in Madeleine's recollection, she had to correct her dunce of a mother that the grass was wet from rain, not dew.

#4: All of the stuff about the rain is true.  In fact, I will never forget having to stand on the pool deck timing events all while getting increasingly more soaked to the bone.  It was miserable, and the tents definitely flooded and Madeleine definitely cried.  However, I am curious about the fact that she ended her story with the rain stopping and didn't bother to mention that in the midst of the torrential rain, she got into the pool and WON THE GIRLS' 8-AND-UNDER BUTTERFLY FINALS.  That, to me, seemed like the highlight of the meet for her, but I guess she's just scarred by the rain.

I asked her about this, in fact:

ME: Madeleine, how come you didn't write about winning the butterfly?
MADELEINE: Because it's called "A Day in the Rain at A's."

Oh, so I guess it can only be about the rain and not about any of the actual swimming events that took place in the rain.

At any rate, I give A's to "A Day in the Rain at A's!"  Bravo, Madeleine!

In Which the Girls Do Not Know How to Handle a Crisis

Yesterday, I enjoyed the lovely experience of puncturing my hand with a flat-top screwdriver while I attempted to open the back of my car key fob to replace the battery.  The screwdriver slipped, shot straight into my hand, and next thing I knew, blood was gushing all over my fingers.  I ran to the bathroom to run it under the sink and shouted downstairs to the girls, hoping one of them could get me a paper towel to compress the wound with.

ME: Girls!  I need some help!
GIRLS: (silence)
ME: GIRLS!  I NEED HELP!
GIRLS: (shouting from downstairs) What?
ME: I NEED HELP!

The girls started on their way upstairs when the sensation of the water pressure on my fresh and deep wound hit me.  I let out a shriek of pain, which sent the girls into panic.  They were falling over each other running to the bathroom screaming hysterically.

GIRLS: WHAT'S WRONG?  (seeing my bloody hand) MOMMY!!!!  MOMMY!!!!
ME: I just need a paper towel.
MADELEINE: (running off and returning with the whole roll, which I subsequently got bloody as I took hold of it to rip a piece off)
GIRLS: MOMMY!  Are you DYING?  Mommy's DYING!
ME: I just need to put pressure on my wound.
JULIA: I'm calling Daddy!
ME: No, don't call-
MADELEINE: MOMMY GET A BAND-AID!!!!!!!
ME: I have to put pressure first-
JULIA: PLEASE CAN I CALL DADDY?!?
ME:  There's nothing Daddy can do from-
JULIA: PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!
ME: I don't know what calling Daddy is going to do-
JULIA: (running into her room to get her phone) He's not ANSWERING!  Can I call Auntie Shannon?
ME: No!  Girls.  Listen.  What I really need is for you just to sit with me for a few minutes so I can make sure the bleeding stops.
JULIA: BUT WHAT IF IT DOESN'T?  MOMMY YOU NEED TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL!
ME: Just let me get the bleeding to stop.  Listen.  Julia, if for some reason I pass out, you know to call 911 on your cell phone, right?
JULIA: (looking panicked) YOU'RE GONNA FAINT?!?
ME: I don't think I'm going to.  But just so you'd know what to do.
JULIA: What if the bleeding doesn't stop?
ME: Then I'd go to the hospital.
GIRLS: (erupting into a mayhem of shrieking and sobbing)

At this point, Madeleine decided to run get me several boxes Band-Aid, and completely face-planted in the hallway, leading to Julia nearly toppling over her on her way back from texting Ethan.  When I found out what she had texted, I was NOT HAPPY.  And this is how I found out.

Ten minutes later:

ME: Okay, girls, you can go back to watching your show.  The bleeding has slowed way down.  I'm okay.
MADELEINE: But what if you DIE?!?
ME: I'm not going to. Julia, why don't you text Daddy to say ignore your missed call?
JULIA: I already texted him.
ME: What did you text?
JULIA: I said Mommy's gonna pass out and she's going to the hospital.

Julia didn't overreact AT ALL.


By the way, my hand is wounded but under control, so the panic is over.  But CLEARLY the girls need to work on their crisis-management skills, OMG.  When you're the one gushing blood but you wind up having to get everybody else calmed down, you know something is not working!

Madeleine's (Re-Kindled) Obsession

Can you tell what Madeleine is back to being obsessed about ever since Julia's birthday party?

I don't think the missing mermaid picked a very good hiding place.  I can totally see her.

This one is about Ariel's daughter.  Or, should I say, the littlest mermaid is the daughter of the little mermaid.

YEAH!  Friendship power!

I call this one Two and a Half Mermaids.

Do you think that torso-less tail belongs to the incomplete mermaid in the picture above this one?



Not only is Madeleine drawing mermaids left and right, but she's back to sleeping with her legs in her mermaid blanket, despite the fact that she's overheating some nights.  A mermaid has to suffer for her beauty, folks.

Riddle

MADELEINE: Mommy, I have a joke for you!  What do you call a maid who loves butterflies?
ME: Uh...I have NO idea.
MADELEINE: A mermaid!
ME: Umm...oh!  I get it.  Because of butterfly the swim stroke?
MADELEINE: (proudly beaming) Yes!
JULIA: Oh.  I thought the answer was "buttmaids."

Um.

Family Movie Night

Last night, after Thanksgiving dinner, we Rowes watched a movie in the Rowe parents' bedroom.  The girls got all snuggly and cozy:

We settled in to watch "Legally Blonde," which they had never seen.  I figured Madeleine would love it, seeing as she's obsessed with the movie "Clueless," and "Legally Blonde" has a very similar premise (ditzy chic protagonist realizes she actually has potential and taps into her inner smarts, winning the heart of the older, academically-inclined man in the end.)  However, I didn't anticipate Madeleine would have as much trouble following this movie as she did.  Julia seemed to totally get the whole thing, while Madeleine seemed at times as if she had somehow been watching the scenes out of order.

Some examples of this viewing experience:

1.) After Brooke, the defendant that protagonist Elle Woods is representing, appears in several jail AND trial scenes, this same defendant then walks into the courtroom on the umpteenth day of trial.

MADELEINE: Wait.  Who's that BLONDE lady?
ME: Honey, that's Brooke.  Remember she's on trial for murder?
MADELEINE: Huh?


2.) When Elle Wood's air-headed fashionista friends from LA come to Boston to see Elle in trial, several courtroom faux pas occur, which sparked laughter from Ethan, Julia and I.

MADELEINE: (in response to everything we laughed at) Huh?  Wait.  What happened?


3.) After lawyer/love-interest Emmett encourages Elle to question the daughter of the murdered victim on her own, Elle manages to catch the daughter in a lie, leading to the daughter blurting out that she, not Brooke, had in fact killed her father.

COURTROOM ON TV: (erupting into gasps and cheers)
MADELEINE: Wait.  What happened??
ME: Elle won the trial.
MADELEINE: Huh?  Wait.  How?  I don't get it.


4.) In the final scene of the movie, captions appear over each character's close-up, divulging what is in store in the near future.  In a close-up of Elle's former jerk of a boyfriend, Warner, we discover that he is graduating law school without honors, without a girlfriend, and without a job.  A close-up of Warner's ex-fiancee Vivian comes with a caption saying that Vivian dumped Warner and is now best friends with Elle.  Then comes a close-up of the lawyer Emmett, with a caption stating that he started his own law firm and has been dating Elle for two years, and is planning to propose that evening.

MADELEINE: Huh?  Who's EMMETT?

Okay.  Seriously? 

ME: Honey, remember?  He's the guy that gave Elle advice about law school in the beginning, and he was the only one to believe in her at the trial?
MADELEINE: But I didn't ever hear them say that guy's name.
JULIA: Madeleine, they just showed a PICTURE of him!
MADELEINE: Yeah, but, there were TWO guys in the picture.

It is true that in the close-up of Emmett (Luke Wilson), you can see an older man sitting next to him in the audience of Elle's graduation.  However, one would assume that it doesn't take a rocket scientist to deduce -- even without remembering Emmett's name -- that the person the caption was referring to was the one who was a MAJOR CHARACTER IN THE MOVIE and not the rando getting a cameo sitting next to him.

Anyway, I guess "Legally Blonde" was not the same level of greatness as "Clueless" for Madeleine, but Julia at least enjoyed it!

Signing off with a quick HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my TWELVE-YEAR-OLD!!! Love you, Julia!

Julia Takes a Bath

In which Julia struggles to do simple things like taking a bath:

JULIA: Mommy?  After you shower, can I try out my new bath bombs that I got from my birthday party?
ME: Sure. (taking my shower, then setting the faucet to the bath setting) Okay.  I put the faucet on the tub setting.
JULIA: Okay.  Mommy?  How do I get the bath bombs out? (carrying the package to me)
ME: I think you need to cut it.  Go get some scissors.
JULIA: (re-emerging with scissors) Now what?
ME: Now cut it and see if you can get it out.
JULIA: (attempting one scissor cut) Nope.
ME: Okay.  Give it to me.  (cutting through the packaging and taking out the bath bomb, which was in its own plastic packaging) Open this over the tub, so it doesn't get everywhere.
JULIA: Okay.  Wait.  Mommy?  Can you help me turn on the tub?
ME: I already put it on the bath setting.  Just turn the water on.  Start with hot, feel it with your hand, and add a little cold if it feels too hot.
JULIA: But can you turn it on for me?
ME: You just turn the handle on the faucet.
JULIA: Which WAY?
ME: There's only one way. 
JULIA: How do I know what the right way is?
ME: If you turn the handle and it moves and water comes out, it's the right way.  If you try to turn it and it won't budge, then it's the wrong way.
JULIA: Okay (moving the handle) I did it!!
ME: Great.  I knew you could do it.
JULIA: Mommy?  How high should I fill it?
ME: Well, we don't want it to overflow, so don't fill it up to the edge.
JULIA: So, like, halfway?
ME: Sounds perfect.
JULIA: Wait. Mommy?  How do I get the bath bomb out?
ME: Just pull the packaging apart.
JULIA: But I don't know how.
ME: Pull on it.
JULIA: I tried that already!
ME: Okay.  I'll help you, but then I really need to make a pumpkin pie!
JULIA: Okay.  Sorry!  (holding on to one end of the packaging while I pulled and got the top part open)
ME: Okay, there you go. Drop it in the bath and hop in when it's halfway full.
JULIA: Okay!


About ten minutes later:

JULIA: Mommy?  How much LONGER will it take to fill up?  It's taking FOREVER!
ME: Let me see (leaving my pie crust dough to go look) That looks good.  It will rise higher when your body weight is in it.  Go ahead and take your bath.
JULIA: Okay.

About 30 seconds later:

JULIA: Mommy!  I wasted the WHOLE THING because I didn't put the drain thing in and all the water drained out!
ME: You didn't plug the drain?
JULIA: No!  I didn't know I was SUPPOSED to!
ME: Okay, well put the stopper in and fill it back up.  You can just get in now so you can use what's left of the water.
JULIA: But the whole bath bomb dissolved and went down the drain!
ME: Okay.
JULIA: Can I start again with a different bath bomb?
ME: Yes.

About five minutes later:

JULIA: Mommy!  Do I put the drain thing in and then take it out?
ME: What?
JULIA: Like, do I keep the drain thing out right now or put it in?
ME: (going into the bathroom) Honey.  (putting the stopper into the tub)
JULIA: Well, I didn't KNOW I was supposed to have that IN THERE!  I haven't taken a bath in a REALLY LONG TIME!

Common sense is sometimes not her forte.

By the time Julia actually got her bath going, we had run out of hot water, which also meant that as I tried to do the dishes from my baking, I was stuck with lukewarm sink water.  However, the second bath bomb did not go to waste, as Julia plunged on in to the non-hot water and bathed anyway, so I guess the second time was (sort of) the charm!

Whirlwind Weekend

The Rowe girls (and their parents) had a busy weekend, starting with a swim meet on Saturday:

Julia went into the meet convinced that she was going to swim poorly, and instead, she swam a New England qualifying time in the 50 butterfly and took a whopping six seconds off her 100 freestyle.  Finally happy with her results, she was buoyant after the race, and undoubtedly spent time galloping later that evening thinking about what events Lilly Mintz qualified for New Englands in.

Madeleine also swam the 50 butterfly and the 100 freestyle, and she happened to be in the lane I was timing for her 100 free.  This was the first time Madeleine had ever swam that particular event, and I could not emphasize enough that she was going to be swimming a 100.

ME: So Madeleine.  This is a one hundred.  That means you're going to swim four laps.
MADELEINE: Uh-huh.
ME: So you don't stop after two laps like in the fifty.  Four laps.  Down, flip turn, back, flip turn, down AGAIN, flip turn, and back.
MADELEINE: Okay.

I was kind of shocked that she actually swam it without incident, and even qualified for District Championships.  After all, this is the kid who, on Monday at a Harvard swim clinic, did this:

COACH: Okay, we're going to do open turns now.  So swim butterfly or breast stroke to the wall and show me your open turn.
SEVERAL KIDS IN FRONT OF MADELEINE: (swimming fly or breast to the wall and doing an open turn)
MADELEINE: (obliviously swimming freestyle to the wall and doing a flip turn)
COACH: Madeleine, that was a beautiful freestyle flip turn, but we're doing OPEN TURNS right now.
MADELEINE: (looking as if hearing this for the first time)


Happily, she pulled it off, and managed to win her 50 butterfly to boot.

Sunday was an even busier day.  After church in the morning, we Rowes headed to one of our town's elementary schools to see a production of "The Little Mermaid" onstage, performed by our town's Community Theater.  There we met a bunch of Julia's friends, who we were treating to the show, as part of Julia's birthday party celebration:

I was worried the show might be a little too juvenile for a bunch of middle schoolers, but instead, the girls enjoyed it, and it turned out to be a little too adult for Madeleine.

URSULA: (singing the word "damn" in one of her songs)
MADELEINE: (gasping and turning to me) I think she SWEARED!
ME: Yeah, I think she did.
URSULA: (singing the word "hell" in another song)
MADELEINE: (gasping) Mommy!  I think she sweared AGAIN!

Swearing aside, Madeleine delighted in all aspects of the show, keeping a whispered running commentary going on which singers she liked, which she didn't, which songs were her favorite, and which special and added effects were most exciting.

MADELEINE: Mommy!  Bubbles!

or

MADELEINE: (covering her ears) That was LOUD!

or

MADELEINE: Mommy!  I think I've seen that guy who plays Prince Eric before.  I think he might play Cedric Diggory in "Harry Potter!"

I don't know, suburban community theater might be kind of small potatoes for a European movie actor.

Madeleine also shared her critique of the singers after the show had ended.

MADELEINE: They all had too much BRATO.  I don't like brato.  It sounded like they were trying way too hard to sing with so much brato.
JULIA, ETHAN AND I: It's VIBRATO.
MADELEINE: What?
JULIA, ETHAN, AND I: It's called "vibrato."
MADELEINE: It is?!?

Upon leaving the performance, we all headed back to the Rowe household for pizza and cake to celebrate Julia's upcoming birthday:

And immediately after scarfing down all that food, we said good-bye to Julia's friends and headed over to the Y for the Lap-a-thon!  There was only 1/2 hour left in the event, so I told my girls to just swim as many laps as they could in that time and it would be good enough.  Julia whipped out 78 and Madeleine 62, so we were able to head home knowing we'd raised some money for the Y and gotten in a quick workout.  Of course, the girls were jonesing for more cake once we got home, and, well, since it was kind of a special day, I let them go for it.

Looking forward to some down time as we head into Thanksgiving, after the whirlwind of a weekend we had!

Locker Room Talk

In the Y locker room after swim team practice:

MADELEINE: (pointing to the sign that said "Pool" with Braille underneath it) Mommy?  How do people ever learn to READ sign-language?

Um, wrong disability, honey.

Also in the Y locker room after swim team practice:

MADELEINE: (from her shower) So Mommy.  I made up a NEW dance to "Crocadilly Oh My."  Watch! 

At which point I had to peek my head around the shower curtain to watch her dancing buck naked while singing the words to the hand-clapping song.  She was determined to show me the REAL DEAL though, and re-staged the performance for me once we were home:






That was amazing.  If only there were a sign language version of it.

The Cow Goes Moo

Madeleine's made-up song while she played with Lego Friends (interrupted by spilling her yogurt on the dining room floor and needing to wipe it up.)  It starts off with the plaintive air of a southern spiritual:




But becomes decidedly more upbeat as the Lego play session carries on:




Whether it was the relief of having cleaned up the yogurt, or just the inherent nature of where the song wanted to go, the uptempo shift completely took over.  I'm feeling pretty upbeat myself, listening to it.  Everything really IS better when the cow goes moo!

Food Woes

My RIDONCULOUSLY picky children, when it comes to eating perfectly normal things:


JULIA: (in the car on the way home from chorus) Mommy?  I'm STARVING.
ME: Okay, well I'm gonna feed you dinner at five tonight because you have swim at 6.
JULIA: But it's 4:23!
ME: Right, so you don't have to wait long.
JULIA: But I'm SOOOO hungry!
ME: Okay, well, you can wash off some blueberries when we get home and have those as a snack.
JULIA: But they're all SHRIVELED UP.
ME: I just bought them yesterday. 
JULIA: Yeah, but they're shriveled.
ME: They're brand new.  They're fresh.
JULIA: No they're not. They shrivel up in ONE DAY!

But...they really don't.  If she wants to see shriveled, I'll show her the next container of blueberries that gets pushed to the back of the fridge and I find it months later and realize I forgot all about it.


MADELEINE: (carrying up her dinner plate, empty except for one detested zucchini and one - usually beloved - pepper to the sink)
ME: Wait.  What's wrong with this pepper?  (forking the pepper to hold out to her as she scampered into her room and shut the door to hide from it)
MADELEINE: It has (inaudible) on it.
ME: It has WHAT on it?
MADELEINE: Frankenstein marks.


The kids are on to me.  I'm totally carrying out creepy food experiments by rapidly shriveling my blueberries and making our peppers into monstrous necrotic creatures.  Good thing they were too smart to be fooled into eating those horrid items.

Bedtime Snuggles

This evening's bedtime snuggle conversation:


MADELEINE: Mommy?  Do you ever feel like your mouth needs to PRONOUNCE things?
ME: Uh...yeah...?
MADELEINE: Like: (clicking her tongue) That's usually the one for me.


I...um...I just don't even have anything to say about that.

New Drawing

Madeleine's latest drawing:

You get the choice of New York gals.  You can get the Summer gal, or opt for the Special! Christmas gal, who is seemingly so special that she does not have arms, hands, or a mouth!

Halloween!

Happy Halloween from the Rowe family!

Madeleine had a lot of wavering on her costume idea.  Back in the summer, she had asked for a mermaid costume, but upon googling various mermaid tails, she instead fell in love with the actual wearable swimming tail with monofin.  Next thing I knew, she was forking over a bunch of her savings to get that tail to wear to the pool, and no actual costume was bought.

Since we have a slew of dress-up items and leftover costumes from Julia, Madeleine figured she'd be able to put something together easily.  She semi-settled on being Ginny Weasley, but as Halloween drew near, she resurrected her dream of being a mermaid.  I didn't have to buy a new costume, however, because she had LOTS of creative ways to make this work:

-She was just going to take tiny baby steps with her legs inside the fin of her swimmable mermaid tail
-She was going to make her OWN mermaid tail out of cardboard
-She was going to wear her swimmable mermaid tail but stick her legs through the holes through which the monofin is inserted
-She was going to wear her mermaid knee socks and Julia's mermaid-patterned skirt

The lattermost option was the one she finally seemed most settled on, except that I wasn't digging it since it kind of looked like she was just wearing clothes:

MADELEINE: Well, I'll ADMIT that it doesn't really look like a costume, but...let's think of ways we can IMPROVE it.

This was Monday.  She had two days to come up with something.

Instead, she just got lazy and thankfully switched back to Ginny Weasley.  So tonight Julia the Sorceress and Ginny Weasley got ready for a neighborhood Halloween party, followed by trick-or-treating with friends!:

At the neighborhood party, Madeleine saw two boys from her class, who were dressed in costumes similar to this:

MADELEINE: (to one of the boys, as he passed by her) Are you a criminal?

Uh...in a way...

Anyway, Madeleine and one of her best friends went trick-or-treating with Ethan and I, and Julia and three of her friends got to go off on their own through the neighborhood.  Everybody gathered back at our house to trade candies and check out their loot, and at long last it is time for all the Rowes to retire for the evening.  Halloween 2018: Check!

Snapping

During the walk home from school this afternoon, Madeleine showed off her increased ability to snap her fingers.

MADELEINE: Mommy.  I'm getting really good at this now!  (snapping several times)
ME: Wow!  You really are!
MADELEINE: But Mommy?  I don't really *like* the sound, because it sounds like...
ME: Like what?
MADELEINE: (glancing around furtively at the other children and adults walking near us) Mmm...
ME: It sounds like what?
MADELEINE: (nearly inaudibly) Mmm...I can't really...
ME: Okay.

Once we had reached a part of the sidewalk that was clear of people, Madeleine resumed the conversation.

MADELEINE: Okay.  I don't really like the sound, because it sounds like popcorn popping out of BUTTCRACKS.
ME: Uh...
MADELEINE: Doesn't it?  Listen (snapping again)
ME: I can see how it sounds like popcorn popping.  But why does it have to be out of buttcracks?
MADELEINE:  Because it's DISGUSTING!
ME: If it sounds disgusting to you, then why are you working so hard on snapping?
MADELEINE: Because.  Once you get GOOD at it, it sounds like: (clapping her hands sharply.)
ME: Oh.  Okay.  I see.

It's like learning an instrument, I guess.  Like, the violin sounds pretty horrible under a beginner's bow, so the goal is to evolve from a dying cat's howl to sweetness.  And apparently, with snapping, the goal is to evolve from popcorn popping out of buttcracks to hand claps.

Morning Gory

So, we had a fun morning in the Rowe household. 

Julia asked me to take out her birthstone studs and put her hoop earrings in her ears.  20 minutes until the bus, plenty of time for a simple task, right?

Except it turned out that the backing of the of the studs had actually become lodged inside the skin of Julia's earlobe.  Like, it wasn't even visible to the eye.  The skin had enveloped it completely.  I finally managed to extract the front of the stud from its backing and pull it out of her ear, but it was a combined effort between Ethan and I to actually locate and then remove the backing, using a pair of sterilized tweezers.

Julia's response to all of this was to sob hysterically throughout the entire procedure and refuse any alternative options we offered.

ME: Let me see if I can grab onto the edge of the backing with tweezers.
JULIA: (wailing in hysteria) But that will HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURT!  It hurts!  Ow!  It hurts!
ETHAN: Do you think we should just take her to the ER?
JULIA: (wailing in more escalated hysteria) NOOOOOOOOO!  I don't wanna go to the HOOOOSPIIIIIIIITAAAAAAAALLL!  NOOOOOOO!
ETHAN: Okay, well, let me just look at it.
JULIA: But it HUUUUUUUUUUURTS when you touch iiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!

Not giving us a lotta options here, Jules. 

Ethan finally managed to get the backing out with the tweezers, and I set about cleaning Julia's ear with rubbing alcohol and applying a generous coating of triple antibiotic ointment.

ME: It's still bleeding a bit, and it will probably continue to ooze blood during the day.
JULIA: (resuming to hysteria) BUT I DON'T WANT BLOOOOD ALL OVER MY FAAAAACE AT SCHOOOOOOOOOL!!!!
ETHAN: Well, go to the nurse if it starts bleeding more.

Ugh, that poor kid; it was gruesome enough trying to perform the procedure; I can;t imagine how painful it was to feel it.

Meanwhile, my morning with Madeleine was a bit more typical:

MADELEINE: Mommy.  What did the EAR say to the MOUTH?  Wait.  I mean...what did the EAR say to the...the...the...wait, what's the kind of music?  That's really LOUD?  With the screaming?
ME: Uh, heavy metal music? 
MADELEINE: Oh.  Yeah!  What did the EAR say to the heavy-metal music?
ME: What?
MADELEINE: Stop it.  You're making me EAR-itated.  (beaming proudly.)  Get it?  EAR?  Itated?

I get it.  She's got a future in stand-up comedy.

Two Dreams

Madeleine, upon emerging from her bedroom this morning:

"I had two dreams.  One was kind of scary, and the other one was just disappointing.

So, we were on this walk, and there was this place that everyone thought was a haunted house.  This doggie pulled us through a tube, into the place, and there was this guy and he was the Addams Family dad, and everyone thought that he was evil, but he wasn't.  The only thing that scared me, though, was that he had pet cobras.  He wasn't evil, but the dog was evil, so I was UNSURE about him, because every time we went back, the dog would grab me.  And I left my coat there, and I didn't know if I should go back, but then I was like, well, I really love that coat, so I went back.  And the guy was showing us around, and then I got scared, because he was like, if you didn't like the cobras, they would try and eat you, but they didn't.  They were nice.  They didn't even go near me.  Which I was very GLAD about.  Then they showed us this thing that said, do you wanna stay, or do you wanna go, so we all just left.

Well, actually, I had THREE dreams, but one of them was kinda BORING, so I don't really feel like telling that one.  So I'll just tell you the second dream.

So, I was just here, and then Shannon brought over this package, because for my birthday, I had gotten this mermaid doll, but she had legs, she didn't have a tail.  It was actually a mermaid doll SET, so I got so excited.  It had, like, different stands, it had an actual tail, it had a place for the tails to sit, and I was just so excited.  And then: this is the SUPER weird and crazy part.  So, I went on this adventure with a little girl, and she got excited about it too, so I was gonna let her play with it too, but I woke up in the dream, but I WASN'T really awake in real life, so I was like, 'it's a dream, it's a dream,' but when I woke up in the dream, the mermaid set wasn't there.  And then I woke up for real."


Okay, well, way to start the day with a burst of imaginative creativity!  And it's only 7am!

Madeleine Musings

Madeleine musings:

MADELEINE: I wish I could raise a thousand dollars so I could buy a pool for school!
ME: A thousand dollars, huh?
MADELEINE: Yeah.  Then we could use it at PE.  And...maybe we could even use it at recess!

Okay, Madeleine, you get on that.  Anyone want to contribute to the $1000 elementary school pool fun?  I know it's a steep price to pay for a pool, but think of all the PE and recess uses it would get!


And speaking of school and PE, Madeleine is super excited for her bike rodeo tomorrow, in which all 3rd graders take a bike safety test in order to get a bike license.  This license then allows them to ride to and from school on their own.

MADELEINE: The BAD thing about tomorrow is that we don't have PE until the end of the day.
ME: Oh, so you have to wait all day?
MADELEINE: Yeah.  Maybe we can do a math lesson about bikes.  And maybe for Writing Workshop, we can WRITE about bikes.  And otherwise I'll just spend the day, like, PRETENDING to ride a bike without the bike.  Mommy.  Here's my BIKING IMPRESSION: (holding her hands on imaginary handlebars and marching her legs up and down.)  Vrrrrooooom!  Well.  Wait.  That's more like a car.
ME: Yeah, the sound is more like a car, but your motions do look like a bike!
MADELEINE: Yeah.  And here's my ONE-PEDAL biking: (moving only one foot up and down.)  Mommy.  It's like: "You've heard of a tricycle, now THIS is a...this is a...."
ME: A unicycle?
MADELEINE: A unicycle!  Wait.  Mommy.  A unicycle is just one wheel.  This is two wheels and only one pedal.
ME: Yeah, well a tricycle is not three pedals, it's three wheels.  So if you're comparing it to a tricycle-
MADELEINE: No, Mommy, this is two wheels, it's just one pedal.
ME: I understand.  I'm just saying if you're talking about a tricycle, that has three wheels, but not three pedals, so-
MADELEINE: No, but Mommy, I'm doing just one pedal.
ME: Right. 
MADELEINE: Okay.  How 'bout this. "You've heard of a bicycle, now here's a...MICYCLE!"

Okay.  Yes.  A one-pedaled bike is called a micycle.  Very clever.  Glad she understood my point that if she was comparing a one-pedaled bike to a tricycle she had the wrong analogy.  I hope someday Madeleine will earn a fortune on her new one-pedaled invention, the micycle.

Down By the Bay

As I was making my befuddled way into the bathroom this morning upon being awoken by my alarm, Madeleine came cheerfully bounding out of her bedroom to greet me.

MADELEINE: Mommy!  I made up a new verse to "Down by the Bay!"
ME: Oh, yeah?
MADELEINE: (launching into song) Down by the baaaaaay, where the watermelons grooooow, back to my hooooome, I dare not gooooo, for if I dooooo, my mother will saaaaaay: Did you ever see a warthog being a FART-DOG, down by the bay!
ME: Uh...that's great.
MADELEINE: (brightly) I'm gonna go lounge around! (flouncing off back to her bedroom.)

Now, THAT is one heck of a morning greeting.

Madeleine's Halloween Ideas

In the car today, Madeleine came up with some ideas for the bowl of candy we'll leave out for trick-or-treaters.

MADELEINE: Mommy!  I have a GREAT idea!  This year, in our Halloween candy bowl, let's put a HAND!
ME: Okay.
MADELEINE: Actually, no...a HEAD!
ME: A head, huh?
MADELEINE: Yeah.  But what if someone actually TAKES the head.  It's supposed to be just for decoration.
ME: Hmmm.
MADELEINE: Mommy?  The reason I really want a HEAD in our candy bowl is because...every year, I look around, and people have: blow-up dragons, blow-up arches you can walk under, blow-up Snoopy, giant spiders, sparkly pumpkin lights, bats you can hang to look like they're flying...well, actually, I've never seen those, but I can imagine them, and they're probably real...and we just have: ART.  Like, art we made at Plaster Fun Time.  And we have a bowl full or SO much candy, and then we're just like, "Eh, take one or two" and we leave a note and so you can't even really SEE the bowl.


Sheesh.  Harsh criticism on my Halloween decorating.  I guess our festive hand-made door hangings are not cutting it.  I've gotta step it up and get some bats I can hang to look like they're flying so we can keep up with the neighborhood here.

Observation

Cousin Owen is here for a visit, and Madeleine had an astute observation after gazing at him.

MADELEINE: Isn't it weird how babies look so small and then they grow and grow?  Also, I never knew that babies have smaller heads.  Like, I look at the kindergarteners at school and I'm like, "Woah, their heads are tiny!"


I think Madeleine is the exception to this rule though.  Her noggin was pretty gargantuan when she was a baby:

A Student's Dictionary

Madeleine continues to enjoy the Students' Dictionary that she brought home from school yesterday.  She is using it for ALL kinds of knowledge, since it contains trivia and not just word definitions.  This morning, while I was in the shower, she came into the bathroom to read me all the so-called "Big Words" listed in her dictionary, as well as their meanings.  I couldn't really hear her over the sound of the water running, but I caught the tail end as I turned the shower off and grabbed a towel.

MADELEINE: "This word is forty-five letters and its definition is a lung disease caused by breathing in certain particles."  (looking up at me in horror) That's disturbing.

(I later discovered the word to be "pneumonoltramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis.")

I was about to leave the bathroom when I was assaulted by more trivia.

MADELEINE: Mommy!  "Ten.  One Hundred.  One Thousand.  One Million.  One Billion.  One Trillion.  One Quardillion.  One Quintillion.  One Sextillion.  One Septillion.  One Octillion.  One Nonillion.  One Decillion.
ME: Yeah.  That's a lot of zeros.
MADELEINE: (looking at me as if I were a dimwit blindly missing the point.)  It's the MONTHS.

Yeah.  No, it's really not though.

MADELEINE: Mommy?  I *like* the names of those numbers, even though I *don't* like saying ONE of the words that's part of one.
ME: What word?
MADELEINE: (giving me a significant look)
ME: Sex-tillion?
MADELEINE: Yeah.

Yup.  The numbers are named after months and sex, that's right.

At breakfast, Madeleine insisted that I quiz her on words from her dictionary, which she would then spell to me.

ME: What words do you want?
MADELEINE: I don't know.  Just quiz me on HARD words.
ME: Okay.  (flipping through the "A" pages) "Anthropologist."
MADELEINE: Yikes.  Well, Mommy, I didn't mean THAT hard.


The one thing Madeleine hasn't used her dictionary for?

MADELEINE: (From her bedroom, with the door shut) MOOOOOMMMMYYYY!
ME: (wondering if I'd heard something) Yeah?
MADELEINE: (silence)
ME: (Getting up from reading my book to go to her bedroom.) Did you call me?
MADELEINE: Yeah.  Um, Mommy?  Well, I *could* use my dictionary for this, but that would take more TIME, so...what's a B-U-R-E-A-U?


Yup.  It's a good thing she's got this dictionary.

Playdate Activity

This is what all third graders do during an after-school playdate, right?:





NOTE: the elements are not a part of any third grade homework.  The girls were just SUPER excited about their new school dictionaries.  And let's be honest.  Why *not* sit and recite periodic elements with a friend?  What fun!

Little Einsteins

Conversation between the girls and Auntie Shannon (aka Shanaynay) this evening:

MADELEINE: Remember when you called Julia DEAFO?
JULIA: I didn't like that!  It was mean!
AUNTIE SHANNON: Sorry honey.
JULIA: And Shanaynay, what if you said "HEY DEAFO!" and an ACTUAL DEAF PERSON heard you?  Wouldn't you feel bad???


Looks like Julia is really getting something out of that new middle school education she's receiving.

Being Julia

Sometimes I am taken completely unawares by the randomness of what comes out of Julia's mouth.  Take, for example, her impromptu song she burst out with while making herself a cup of hot chocolate in the kitchen this morning.

JULIA: Can I make myself some hot chocolate?

ME: Sure.

JULIA: (beginning her hot chocolate preparations and launching into song) Oh, Iiiiii'm a butt snuffleupagus, a butt snuffleupagus, I'm a butt snuffleupagus...

ME: Um...okay.

Sometimes Julia herself is taken unawares by the randomness of her brain.

AUNTIE SHANNON: Huh?  Who typed "dingleberry" on my list of things to do today?

GIRLS: (silence)

AUNTIE SHANNON: Madeleine?  Did you come type "dingleberry" on my computer?

MADELEINE: No.

AUNTIE SHANNON: Who typed this?

JULIA: Honestly, it was probably me, but I have NO memory of doing that.

And other times, I am completely and utterly NOT surprised by the random thing that pops out of Julia's mouth.

ME: Who keeps closing the blinds in the bathroom at night?

JULIA: Me!

ME: Why do you keep doing that?

JULIA: Because I'm scared of clowns!

Of course she is.  OMG.

A Trip to the Apple Orchard

This afternoon, after school, I took the girls apple picking:

We spent probably a grand total of 10 minutes picking apples and the rest of the time at the Children's Play Area.

As you can see, the girls made some age-appropriate choices in terms of what to play on:

Madeleine in the toddler play area.  Don't worry, Julia stuffed her tall gangly body in one of those bouncers too.

The kids on the caterpillar train, which was otherwise filled with kids in the 1-5 age range.

I tried to point out to Julia that an adult-sized kid might not fit the "kids only" description, but she wasn't buying it.

Just a 9 and 11 year old and a bunch of little kids enjoying the dinky caterpillar train.  Nothing to see here, folks.

At any rate, we have a bag of ripe apples and two happy girls, so all in all it was a success!

9th Birthday!

Well, Madeleine has been micromanaging every detail of her birthday for the past month+, and the big day is finally here!  Let's see how we did for this brand new 9-year-old.

Her hair, outfit, and accessories vision:

The real deal:

Her cake vision (which I just found out about on Sunday, leaving me scrambling to throw something together):

The real deal:

I baked and frosted the above, but Madeleine did the actual decoration.  She is SO incredibly excited about the cake that until 2 days ago I didn't even know I was supposed to make.  I figured I'd be making cupcakes for her party in a few weeks and she'd probably just get dessert at whatever restaurant we go to tonight. NOPE.  It was unicorn cake on the brain and she was gonna make it happen even if she had to bake the whole thing herself.  I am NOT a crafty person, so I was in a panic about this whole thing, but Madeleine is extremely satisfied.

ETHAN: When I saw this cake, I just started laughing.  I thought that Madeleine had probably decorated it, but it was possible that Julia did it, and I couldn't really rule out the chance that Courtney had decorated it.

Yup.  THAT'S HOW GOOD I AM, FOLKS.

Happy, happy 9th birthday to a girl who brings joy to each and every day of my existence! 

Highlights from Church

Madeleine had a lot to say both on the way to church and during the service itself.  As we drove along Route 2A, she pointed out various sights out her window. 

MADELEINE: Mommy?  What's "Passage to India?"  A bank?
ME: No, it's an Indian restaurant.
MADELEINE: Oh.  I thought it was a bank.
JULIA: Madeleine, why would there be a bank called "Passage to India?!?"
MADELEINE: Because.  It just sounds like SUCH a bank name.


Once we were in church, we all used the bathroom, then headed to the front pews, where the Sunday School children sit.  Since choir is still on hiatus, I got to sit with the girls and hear what really goes through Madeleine's brain during the service.

The Sunday school teacher handed out Liturgy books so that the children could follow along with the service.  Unlike the book I use to follow the service, this was a child-friendly version with explanations of various rites and formal titles for the various prayers being said by the Priest.  For instance, the Prayer of Thanksgiving.

MADELEINE: (nudging me and pointing to her book) Huh?!?  ThanksGIVING?!?

Yeah, come on, church officials.  Thanksgiving isn't until November.  It should be the Prayer of Halloween first, don't you think?

ME: It's not a prayer for the holiday of Thanksgiving.  It's a prayer for giving thanks.
MADELEINE: (disappointed) Oh.

At one point, Madeleine began audibly sniffing the air and making a disgruntled face.  She leaned over and sniffed me, and upon deciding that I was not the emitter of the offensive smell, started sniffing herself.  Upon sniffing her hands, she realized she'd found the culprit.

MADELEINE: Huh?!? (putting her hands up to my nose, after which I caught an anti-bacterial scent, as of soap) The DOCTOR'S office?!?
ME: ....
MADELEINE: Maybe it's from the BATHROOM.
ME: From the bathroom soap, I bet.


Later in the service, Madeleine became convinced that her best friend's Jewish father was in one of the pictures in her Liturgy book.

ME: I don't think that's him, honey.  First of all, he's Jewish.
MADELEINE: Yeah, but maybe he was just, like, doing it for the picture, not for real life.

Surely that must be it, and not the fact that there are likely a plethora of white men with gray hair that might resemble each other superficially. 

Madeleine's best friend's father

Apparently, also Madeleine's best friend's father (left)

The best part of the church experience today, however, was the ice cream social for the Sunday School kids after class.  Julia had gobbled her entire sundae up by the time I thought to take a picture, but here's Madeleine looking like a happy camper:

Mid-day ice cream treats are always welcome by the Rowe kids!

Homework Woes

Madeleine has been procrastinating on doing her homework lately, because she understandably wants time to play when she gets home from school.  However, Madeleine, just like her father, tends to lose all track of time when doing something she enjoys.  Hence, she frequently winds up having a panicked melt-down when it's time to go to swim or to bed because she hasn't done her required timed silent reading.

Ethan had a long talk with her about this on the walk to school this morning, and she came up with a great new plan.  She filled me in when I picked her up this afternoon.

MADELEINE: Mommy!  I came up with a GREAT idea for how to do my homework!  So, I'm gonna play American Girls, but my dolls will be doing their reading time!

Well now, what a great way to kill two birds with one stone.  She can do her reading but still play dolls at the same time!

At 3:30, we had this exchange.

ME: So do you want to do your reading before or after swim?
MADELEINE: Before!
ME: Okay, well we have to leave in about 45 minutes, so why don't you go do it now?
MADELEINE: Okay! (scampering off to her bedroom)

At 4:00, we had this exchange:

ME: Okay, we need to get ready for swim in 10 minutes!
MADELEINE: (hysterically) But I didn't do my reading yet!!
ME: Then what have you been doing?!?

This is what she had been doing:

So in setting up her brilliant plan to get her homework done without running out of time and having a panicked melt-down, she ran out of time and had a panicked melt-down.

We went late to swim.  Utter success.

6th Grade Open House

Last night, Ethan and I, along with all the other parents of sixth graders in town, went to Julia's school for "Back to School" night.  This was no easy task, folks; parents were made to follow their child's daily schedule from classroom to classroom, wherein each teacher would give a presentation and slide show about him/herself and about the class's curriculum.  This whole event was two hours long, and involved walking around all four floors of the building finding our way to various classrooms. 

My favorite part of the evening was getting to see Julia's own "About Me" project:

Julia
Kind, athletic, musical, humorous
Older sister, daughter, cousin, niece, grandchild
Lover of family, music, and competitive swimming
Who feels creative, happy, and excited
Who needs to not be stressed, to be a nicer sister, and to not get frustrated
Who fears clowns, fire, and poisonous chemicals
Who gives hugs, love, and presents
Who would like to see peace on earth, Greece, and France
Resident of Massachusetts
Rowe


I vouch for all of her fears.  If she's not coming into our bedroom to tell us she's afraid of clowns, she's telling us she thinks she smells poisonous chemicals or that she's worrying that her air conditioner will explode and cause a fire.  But usually it's clowns.

Today was an early release day so both girls had play-dates, but I picked them up in time to go get our flu shots.  Fun!  The girls treated themselves to a lollipop and toy from the kiddie reward bin, and Julia even got herself this very accurate sticker:

Now, if only she could act like a big boy at night when she's scared of clowns.

Ginny and Emily

Madeleine is writing a book called "Ginny and Emily."  Wanna know what it's about?  The author herself describes it, all whilst failing to stand still for a nanosecond:




I hope you're as excited to read it as I am!!

The Return of Earl

Well, autumn is around the corner, and Earl has made an earlier than usual appearance in the Rowe household.  This grim reaper commences his third year of appearing in unexpected places around the house, like Madeleine's laundry basket, Ethan's exercise bike, and various clothing drawers.  Madeleine especially loves hiding Earl, but simply can't keep from blurting out obvious clues about where we might find him.  For example:

ME: (coming indoors from a run yesterday) Hi honey.
MADELEINE: Mommy.  You have to take your shower in the UPSTAIRS bathroom, okay?  Got it.  The UPSTAIRS one.
ME: I always take showers in the upstairs bathroom. 
MADELEINE: Okay.  So, go on!  Go take your shower.
ME: Well, I have to stretch and drink some water before I'm ready to shower.
MADELEINE: Okay.  But Mommy.  REMEMBER.  Use the UPSTAIRS shower.

Needless to say, I was utterly SHOCKED to open the shower curtain and discover this:

(It's probably good that she was so obvious, because my habit is to turn on the shower without getting in to give the water a minute to warm up.  So Earl would have gotten a good old soaking if I hadn't known to look behind the curtain first.)

Julia, on the other hand, has learned the satisfaction of delayed gratification.  She knows how to pull a prank without giving away her hand in the slightest.  This morning, I arrived at work and had just shut the driver's side door of my car when I decided I didn't need my fleece, since it was warming up. I opened up the door to throw my fleece back in the car, glimpsed towards the back seat, and discovered I had a hitch-hiker!:

This one literally took me by surprise and I found it so funny that I called my director, who had just then pulled into the parking lot, over to the car to see Earl and learn about our family tradition of hiding him.  Well played, Julia, well played.

I can't wait to discover where he's hiding next!